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How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 3:56 am
by hellow533
At the high risk of sounding like I have been pussified in to the most emotional teenaged girl or something ever, I must as a question. Please know this is out of character for me by a long shot.

This might be my seasonal affective disorder talking, but I have set in to a deep depression about women, love, and anything past family. Are you truly able to say that you would die for your loved one?

Now, I'm not talking about family at this point. I realize I am willing to die for my father and vice versa, it has been proven to me when he saved my life, risking his own. My question is, would you do the same for a woman, or for women, would you do the same for a man?

All I can see is greed, filth, slime walking about the streets. Women cheating, lying, stealing, and men doing the same to women as women do to men. I know of no woman in America who isn't like that either. Humans cheat, they are human. But some have that little tad bit more of self-control. Some are good women, some are good men. But, are people loyal enough to die for one another?

Before you answer, ask yourselves this, would you die for your partner, and would they die for you? Is there anything more than platonic love? I know I'm young but I must know. I have to know, and no my heart has never been broken. I have never had a woman to call anything more than my friend. I have never more than liked any human on earth besides my father. Not even my mother would risk her life for me and I know it for a fact, and neither would I do the same for her.

Please answer this. It has been eating at me for months, you don't even know how much I must know this question. Married couples, or even just couples in a relationship, would you die for each other? Think hard about this, you have to. If I held a gun to your head, and a gun to your girlfriend's/wife's head, whether you believe in god or not, would you be willing to say "Take my life, not hers!".

Could she say the same for you?

How about more? Are you willing to raise a hand to your mother or father? Age doesn't matter, I assume most people on this site are adults however.
Are you willing to sin for this person?

How about more? Are you willing to save this person's life to risk your own, even if they loved somebody else more? Or if they fell in love more with somebody else, would you still do everything you could to protect them, make them happy, and do what it takes to make sure they are safe and able to do whatever they need to do? Would you fight off your own parents, or other family (children not included) or kill to let this person be safe? Blood is thicker than love, but I must know how far love can go. Would you stop your parents from hurting your girlfriend or wife if it meant hurting them, or killing them? Would you do the same even if they didn't love you as much as you loved them, or if they loved somebody else?


The reason is because I can't believe somebody would go through all that trouble, especially if that other person loved somebody else. I don't believe in love myself. Not for anybody besides children/parents, and even with parents love can be only so limited. Prove me wrong. Please, tell me if love does or does not exist, and if you aren't willing to do all the things above then I don't consider it love at all, love means you are willing to do ANYTHING for them. Anything. Break the laws of man, break the laws of god, whether they love you back the same way or not.

If you can’t tell me you would go that far, if nobody can tell me they would ever go that far for somebody who does not love them back, then I won’t stand to believe love exists at all.

I will end it here, can somebody love another person enough to say if that person left them for another partner, they would still do everything in their power to protect them and make them happy?

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 8:20 am
by xsvMix
The things you have said here have really gotten me thinking about love in a much deeper way than ever before. Right now I would describe myself as "in love". I have a girlfriend and I have not cheated on her, I fully trust that she has not cheated on me. If I was in the situation that you described above I would definitely choose to die rather than have to watch my girlfriend be killed and have to live with it. The problem is then I force her to go through that. But the idea is that I will happily put myself in harms way if it meant keeping her out of it.

My father openly tells many people that he would kill for me. The thing is he is an alcoholic and has been abusive. Mostly emotionally but also a little physical once in a while. Personally I know I could beat him senseless but out of respect I don't. Luckily I no longer live in the same house. My point here is that the saying "blood is thicker than water" isn't always true.

I put my girlfriend before family and friends. If she ever cheated or was unfaithful then this would change very quickly and she said the same goes for me. We would not stay in the relationship. She has been cheated on before and it affected her very badly. This helps me trust that she won't do it to me and deters me from putting her through it again. I don't want to cheat and I hope I never succumb to any temptations.

The thing is, I know that all the feelings I have are mutual and that she feels the same and acts the same towards me. She puts me before her family too. We are very open and I would describe her as my best friend. I feel there is nothing that I can't tell her and I try tell her everything that I have done, including the things that she won't be happy about. That way we know what is on the table and we can work through it. At this stage though we have not had to face up to any serious trial of character.

The thing about love is that it entails a high level of emotion, higher than that of family. One must be careful to keep this as positive emotion as if you are upset, all that love can quickly turn to a surprising amount of hate.

So in my opinion love does exist, but takes time, effort, and the right person to keep on the right track. Hope this helps

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:11 am
by not_essence2
My view? If you did suddenly put a gun to you and your loved one's head, in the spur of the moment, adrenaline will combine with your personality to become one of two things:
1. You hesitate and don't say anything (rash).
2. You do, because you're so emotionally caught off-guard, say that you would die instead of your loved one and back it up with reasoning that if you let your loved one die, the person would probably kill the second as well, so might as well do something noble before you die, offering a chance of escape (also rash).
So, as you see, I believe both have a chance to happen; however, your personality and the nature of a human affects the decision more than who the person next to you is (although that still has some effect, not much; I know there's still a possibility that even if your archenemy is next to you, you might not let them die before you).
These are my thoughts.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 4:47 pm
by hellow533
Sorry if I went overboard, but you must understand I'm sure. If anything, at least this can get people thinking.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 7:38 pm
by weekend hacker
hellow533 wrote:can somebody love another person enough to say if that person left them for another partner, they would still do everything in their power to protect them and make them happy?

Yes. Maybe it depends from person to person, but if there was no hate when she left I think this will be the case.
I wish I could just say "fuck off bitch, u no love me no moar" but this chemical imbalance we call love doesn't make things that easy.
Yet in a different but similar situation the answer was no o.O
At the time I would have done anything but afterwards? Only for 1 not for the others.
It depends on how things ended.

So I guess the answer is maybe?

But I can guarantee you, this love you speak of, it exists.
Maybe one day you'll find someone who makes you feel like that, and maybe some other day you'll curse the day someone made you feel like that. There is a reason why we consider it a complex concept.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:02 pm
by not_essence2
Wait, was I criticizing your standpoint? Sorry.
But anyways, the brain is probably the most mysterious of the organs as we can't decipher neuron firing sequences at all. Really, I guess it depends on the person more. The best way in a situation where (this is what I perceive) to be unsolvable by theory, is to find real-life examples.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:03 pm
by hellow533
Love is a hard thing to comprehend. Love has limits, and I must accept that. I know a 70something year old (my band teacher from middle school) who has been married to his wife for over 50 years, since high school. He still says they never fight or argue, and only fought once in their entire relationship of over 50 years. She never cheated on him or vice versa, and they are happy. I was wondering if long term commitments like that are realistic. Yes, I am sure they would do anything for each other, whether one left or not. They pretty much spent their entire lives together. And I am also wondering how far would they possibly go for each other.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:14 pm
by not_essence2
Situations are different, I guess. Especially with what society calls "love" today. It's more about domination and power and less about emotions. It feels sad knowing that some people get close to you because it's what they do everyday and never actually commit.

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:39 pm
by WallShadow
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away... jk

A few years back, I reached a point where I was just confused about everything in life. I felt as if I needed something to hold onto and protect, something to do with my life besides learn, work, and die. Just about then I got a boyfriend and I felt as if I found what I wanted to do with my life, but that ended two months later when he just decided that I wasn't right for him. After that I just started hating everything and thinking of how to destroy it. Even to this day, I only live to protect my closest friends and then destroy everything else, nothing really matters to me anymore.

If I had a boyfriend/husband right now, I honestly wouldn't put his life ahead of mine.

- WallShadow <3

Re: How far can love go? (long)

PostPosted: Sun Nov 11, 2012 10:58 pm
by not_essence2
Man, that sounds like you fell. Hard.